• Home
  • Fair Use Disclaimer
  • Terms and Conditions
  • Social Media Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • Medical Disclaimer
  • FTC Compliance
  • Earnings Disclaimer
  • DMCA Compliance
  • Copyright Notice
  • Anti-Spam Policy
ParentingHere.com
  • Home
  • Shop
    • Baby Bouncers
    • Baby Car Seats
    • Baby Clothes
    • Baby Jumpers
    • Baby Toys
    • Baby Walkers
    • Boys Clothing
    • Child Booster Car Seats
    • Child Carriers
    • Childrens Toys
    • Craft Supplies
    • Cribs
    • Funny Parenting T Shirts
    • Girls Clothing
    • Parenting Books
    • Strollers
  • PARENTING TIPS

    Ashley Graham reveals she almost died in childbirth

    An ode to my postpartum body

    You never imagine that you will be ‘The One’…. but what if you were? – Newborn Baby

    Yes my body has changed—but it’s not open for your comments

    What overturning Roe v. Wade could mean for women who experience pregnancy loss

    Is it safe to make homemade baby formula?

    Top 5 common misuses with baby child car restraints – Newborn Baby

    How I took charge of my mental health

    No doula? No problem—experts share how to advocate for yourself during pregnancy

  • PREGNANCY

    Understanding Infertility with Dr. Amy – Podcast Ep 85

    Boy or girl? 12 old wives’ tales for predicting gender

    What To Do When Your Genetic Testing During Pregnancy Isn’t “Normal”

    Newborn Hunger Cues: What You Need to Know

    122 Best Mom Quotes – Baby Chick

    Simple Recipes to Make Your Baby in the First Year

    Baby Girl Names That Start with Q

    This mom had a roadside birth and drove home with the baby still attached!

    20 Tips to Develop Your Child’s Personality for the Better

  • BABY CARE

    The New Silver Cross Dune Stroller Complete Demo and Review — The Baby Cubby

    How To Help and Support New Moms (and How to Ask for Help) — The Baby Cubby

    Transitioning to a Convertible Car Seat Ft. the Diono Radian 3QXT — The Baby Cubby

    How To Teach Ride-On Toys For Toddlers?

    Quincy Mae Spring and Summer Collection SS22

    How to Get More Sleep as Parents — The Baby Cubby

    The New Silver Cross Reef Stroller Complete Demo and Review — The Baby Cubby

    Australian Researchers Make a Significant SIDS Discovery — The Baby Cubby

    The New Silver Cross Dune and Reef Strollers Complete Demo and — The Baby Cubby

  • TODDLERS

    When will the COVID vaccine for kids under 5 be available?

    Should Canadian parents be worried about acute hepatitis in children?

    5 ways to get your kid to play alone

    Fees are dropping! See how much less child care will cost in your city

    15 Simple And Effective Anger Management Activities For Kids

    9 fun typing games for kids

    15 Kindness And Empathy Activities For Kids To Learn

    A Step-by-Step Guide For Kids

    What to do if your three-year-old cries all the time

  • TEENS

    Silly April Holidays To Celebrate With Your Teens

    My Teen Is Failing School, Now What?

    My Daughter Has ADHD and Bipolar Disorder (Part 1)

    40 Things to Make Your Apartment Feel Like Home

    My Daughter Has ADHD and Bipolar Disorder (Part 2)

    33 Bestselling Dorm Essentials for 2022

    Teaching Intentional Kindness

    How to Put Together the Most Complete First Aid Kit For Your Teen

    Practicing Positive Discipline with a Defiant Teenager

  • HEALTH CARE

    Deaf children with developmental delays are better served with cochlear implants than hearing aids

    The effects of maternal SARS-CoV-2 infection on the newborn child

    Parents rise up against drug deaths

    Largest study to date on the effect of vaccination on long-COVID

    Waking up to baby formula shortage

    CDC continues to identify and investigate hepatitis of unknown cause impacting children

    SARS-CoV-2 Omicron linked to rise in croup in young children

    Parental hesitancy and childhood COVID vaccination

    Natural immunity weak and short-lived in unvaccinated after Omicron infection

  • ACTIVITIES & CRAFTS

    15 Clever Toy Car Storage Ideas

    July 4th Cruises in NYC: How to See Macy’s Fireworks From a Boat | MommyPoppins

    Cardboard Roll Bluebird | Kids Activities Blog

    9 Walkable Neighborhoods Near Philly for Family Outings | MommyPoppins

    Easy Disney Pineapple Dole Whip Copycat Recipe to Make at Home

    San Antonio, Texas with Kids: 17 Top Things to Do for Families | MommyPoppins

    Road Trip Scavenger Hunt | Kids Activities Blog

    Visiting Busch Gardens Williamsburg, VA with Kids: What to Know Before You Go | MommyPoppins

    Easy Homemade Butterfly Feeder & Butterfly Food Recipe

  • Contact
  • About
No Result
View All Result
  • Home
  • Shop
    • Baby Bouncers
    • Baby Car Seats
    • Baby Clothes
    • Baby Jumpers
    • Baby Toys
    • Baby Walkers
    • Boys Clothing
    • Child Booster Car Seats
    • Child Carriers
    • Childrens Toys
    • Craft Supplies
    • Cribs
    • Funny Parenting T Shirts
    • Girls Clothing
    • Parenting Books
    • Strollers
  • PARENTING TIPS

    Ashley Graham reveals she almost died in childbirth

    An ode to my postpartum body

    You never imagine that you will be ‘The One’…. but what if you were? – Newborn Baby

    Yes my body has changed—but it’s not open for your comments

    What overturning Roe v. Wade could mean for women who experience pregnancy loss

    Is it safe to make homemade baby formula?

    Top 5 common misuses with baby child car restraints – Newborn Baby

    How I took charge of my mental health

    No doula? No problem—experts share how to advocate for yourself during pregnancy

  • PREGNANCY

    Understanding Infertility with Dr. Amy – Podcast Ep 85

    Boy or girl? 12 old wives’ tales for predicting gender

    What To Do When Your Genetic Testing During Pregnancy Isn’t “Normal”

    Newborn Hunger Cues: What You Need to Know

    122 Best Mom Quotes – Baby Chick

    Simple Recipes to Make Your Baby in the First Year

    Baby Girl Names That Start with Q

    This mom had a roadside birth and drove home with the baby still attached!

    20 Tips to Develop Your Child’s Personality for the Better

  • BABY CARE

    The New Silver Cross Dune Stroller Complete Demo and Review — The Baby Cubby

    How To Help and Support New Moms (and How to Ask for Help) — The Baby Cubby

    Transitioning to a Convertible Car Seat Ft. the Diono Radian 3QXT — The Baby Cubby

    How To Teach Ride-On Toys For Toddlers?

    Quincy Mae Spring and Summer Collection SS22

    How to Get More Sleep as Parents — The Baby Cubby

    The New Silver Cross Reef Stroller Complete Demo and Review — The Baby Cubby

    Australian Researchers Make a Significant SIDS Discovery — The Baby Cubby

    The New Silver Cross Dune and Reef Strollers Complete Demo and — The Baby Cubby

  • TODDLERS

    When will the COVID vaccine for kids under 5 be available?

    Should Canadian parents be worried about acute hepatitis in children?

    5 ways to get your kid to play alone

    Fees are dropping! See how much less child care will cost in your city

    15 Simple And Effective Anger Management Activities For Kids

    9 fun typing games for kids

    15 Kindness And Empathy Activities For Kids To Learn

    A Step-by-Step Guide For Kids

    What to do if your three-year-old cries all the time

  • TEENS

    Silly April Holidays To Celebrate With Your Teens

    My Teen Is Failing School, Now What?

    My Daughter Has ADHD and Bipolar Disorder (Part 1)

    40 Things to Make Your Apartment Feel Like Home

    My Daughter Has ADHD and Bipolar Disorder (Part 2)

    33 Bestselling Dorm Essentials for 2022

    Teaching Intentional Kindness

    How to Put Together the Most Complete First Aid Kit For Your Teen

    Practicing Positive Discipline with a Defiant Teenager

  • HEALTH CARE

    Deaf children with developmental delays are better served with cochlear implants than hearing aids

    The effects of maternal SARS-CoV-2 infection on the newborn child

    Parents rise up against drug deaths

    Largest study to date on the effect of vaccination on long-COVID

    Waking up to baby formula shortage

    CDC continues to identify and investigate hepatitis of unknown cause impacting children

    SARS-CoV-2 Omicron linked to rise in croup in young children

    Parental hesitancy and childhood COVID vaccination

    Natural immunity weak and short-lived in unvaccinated after Omicron infection

  • ACTIVITIES & CRAFTS

    15 Clever Toy Car Storage Ideas

    July 4th Cruises in NYC: How to See Macy’s Fireworks From a Boat | MommyPoppins

    Cardboard Roll Bluebird | Kids Activities Blog

    9 Walkable Neighborhoods Near Philly for Family Outings | MommyPoppins

    Easy Disney Pineapple Dole Whip Copycat Recipe to Make at Home

    San Antonio, Texas with Kids: 17 Top Things to Do for Families | MommyPoppins

    Road Trip Scavenger Hunt | Kids Activities Blog

    Visiting Busch Gardens Williamsburg, VA with Kids: What to Know Before You Go | MommyPoppins

    Easy Homemade Butterfly Feeder & Butterfly Food Recipe

  • Contact
  • About
No Result
View All Result
ParentingHere.com
No Result
View All Result
Home TEENS

Practicing Positive Discipline with a Defiant Teenager

by admin
May 21, 2022
in TEENS



By Ellen F. Gottlieb

Lately, parents in the Your Teen parent Facebook group have been asking for advice about how to address teenage defiance. To supplement the support and wise words of advice graciously posted by other parents, a mindful parenting coach wrote in to offer this perspective.

Dear Your Teen,

My teenage son refuses to listen to or follow the family rules. We have tried everything to get him to comply, including grounding him, without success. He barely completes his homework, regularly breaks curfew, refuses to do any household chores, and is rude and defiant toward me and my husband. Every type of punishment just makes him angrier and more defiant. What should we do? Please help!

Answer | Ellen F. Gottlieb

It sounds like your son’s non-compliant behavior is frustrating you, perhaps even scaring you. Your feelings are understandable and valid. Probably neither of you fully understands why he’s doing this, and communication has broken down, which can make both of you feel disconnected from each other. 

Because your son has been acting out for so long and with increasing intensity, you may feel fed up with your son’s defiance and want to punish him for it. However, I caution you against doing that. You tried punishing him already, and it hasn’t worked to curb his behavior. In fact, you may be stuck in a cycle where punishing him only makes his defiance worse. Now is the time to consider positive parenting.

To break the cycle, I encourage you to take a more mindful approach to discipline, one that tries to figure out what’s going on beneath your son’s behaviors so you can ultimately tailor solutions to your son’s specific needs.

So, what’s going on here? Why is your son acting out, and how can we bring you closer together?

Defiant behavior could mean that your teen wants to be seen, heard, and valued for who they are, complete with their concerns and feelings.

Your son probably doesn’t want to engage in destructive and inappropriate behaviors, but resorts to them because he feels like no one has listened to his smaller cries for help. Defiant behavior might be how he signals he has unmet emotional needs.

Try asking him to talk to you. Your son might need you to listen while he voices concerns. He might need a safe space to express his individual hopes and dreams. He also might need more of your encouragement and confidence in him being able to find his own way, and your assurance that it’s okay to make mistakes because then he can learn from them and prepare better next time.

Connection starts with deep listening.

I coach my clients to listen deeply and be fully present because it helps their teens open up. Letting your son fully express himself without your judgment, criticism, interruption, or reaction will help lay the groundwork for deep trust and emotional bonds.

Ask open-ended questions when you work together to find solutions.

I suggest asking open-ended questions because it helps teenagers look at issues from different angles. So, for instance, instead of asking whether your son did his homework and settling for a yes or no answer, you might ask why he’s not doing it. Maybe he doesn’t understand the instructions. Maybe he doesn’t know how to solve or find the answers. Maybe he’s hungry, or exhausted, or troubled by something else that happened that day. An open-ended question leads to a more meaningful conversation and makes it easier to tailor solutions to your teen’s particular needs.

Don’t be discouraged if your teenager has no immediate answers.

I encourage my clients to tell their teens there are no wrong answers, even when the answer is silence. It’s not uncommon for teens to avoid conversations with their parents. They also might not know the reasons for their behaviors.

Just keep asking those open-ended questions because what you’re doing is leaving the door open for self-reflection and problem-solving later. For now, it’s enough to listen and be present. Teens need to know that their concerns are being heard.

Give your teen greater input and agency, then watch their behavior shift.

When you’re ready, work with your teen to create new household rules, giving him greater input and agency. For example, you can let him negotiate a later curfew and how to divide up household chores. Again, listen to his input without interruption and give him a supportive space to express himself. If he messes up later, instead of punishing him, ask how you can help him abide by these new rules. If periodic adjustments are necessary, you can work on them together. 

I hope you’ll find that a more mindful approach helps eliminate your teen’s defiant behavior by creating space for more connection, change, and growth.



Original Source Link

Previous Post

Easy Homemade Butterfly Feeder & Butterfly Food Recipe

Next Post

Top 5 common misuses with baby child car restraints – Newborn Baby

Related Posts

TEENS

Silly April Holidays To Celebrate With Your Teens

May 24, 2022
TEENS

My Teen Is Failing School, Now What?

May 24, 2022
TEENS

My Daughter Has ADHD and Bipolar Disorder (Part 1)

May 23, 2022
TEENS

40 Things to Make Your Apartment Feel Like Home

May 23, 2022
TEENS

My Daughter Has ADHD and Bipolar Disorder (Part 2)

May 22, 2022
TEENS

33 Bestselling Dorm Essentials for 2022

May 22, 2022
Next Post

Top 5 common misuses with baby child car restraints – Newborn Baby

SARS-CoV-2 Omicron linked to rise in croup in young children

Visiting Busch Gardens Williamsburg, VA with Kids: What to Know Before You Go | MommyPoppins

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recommended

Parental hesitancy and childhood COVID vaccination

3 days ago

This mom had a roadside birth and drove home with the baby still attached!

6 days ago

Baby Girl Names That Start with Q

6 days ago

Deaf children with developmental delays are better served with cochlear implants than hearing aids

5 hours ago

Random Acts of Kindness in an Unkind World

5 days ago

Easy Disney Pineapple Dole Whip Copycat Recipe to Make at Home

2 days ago

Practicing Positive Discipline with a Defiant Teenager

3 days ago

Categories

  • ACTIVITIES & CRAFTS (82)
  • BABY CARE (65)
  • HEALTH CARE (74)
  • PARENTING TIPS (71)
  • PREGNANCY (51)
  • TEENS (84)
  • TODDLERS (27)

Popular Posts

When Will Overnight Visits For Infants With Dad Begin?

2 months ago

What is pregnancy discharge like and when is it a concern?

2 weeks ago

15 Kindness And Empathy Activities For Kids To Learn

2 weeks ago

What overturning Roe v. Wade could mean for women who experience pregnancy loss

2 days ago

Where to See Free and Cheap Movies in New York City With Kids | MommyPoppins

2 months ago

Family-Friendly Campsites Near NYC (With Extras for Kids!) | MommyPoppins

2 weeks ago

Tourette TikTok and Teenage Tic Disorders

1 week ago

Archives

  • May 2022 (285)
  • April 2022 (53)
  • March 2022 (92)
  • February 2022 (24)

Reader's Choices

More evidence that pediatric COVID vaccination prevents MIS-C

by admin
May 10, 2022

...

New Research Discovers How to Spot Babies at Risk of SIDS

by admin
May 15, 2022

...

33 Bestselling Dorm Essentials for 2022

by admin
May 22, 2022

...

Best Sprinkler Parks and Splash Pads in Boston | MommyPoppins

by admin
May 21, 2022

...

Editor's Picks

Study estimates the global RSV disease burden in children under five in 2019

by admin
May 20, 2022

...

Road Trip Scavenger Hunt | Kids Activities Blog

by admin
May 22, 2022

...

Random Acts of Kindness in an Unkind World

by admin
May 20, 2022

...

Transitioning to a Convertible Car Seat Ft. the Diono Radian 3QXT — The Baby Cubby

by admin
May 22, 2022

...

Popular Posts

What overturning Roe v. Wade could mean for women who experience pregnancy loss

by admin
May 22, 2022

...

Requirments, Jobs, Housing and Costs

by admin
May 20, 2022

...

This cult stretch mark treatment promises results in eight weeks

by admin
May 10, 2022

...

There Should Be 2 and 24 Other Bits of Advice For Daughters

by admin
May 13, 2022

...

Copyright © 2022 - ParentingHere - All rights reserved.

No Result
View All Result
  • Home
  • Shop
    • Baby Bouncers
    • Baby Car Seats
    • Baby Clothes
    • Baby Jumpers
    • Baby Toys
    • Baby Walkers
    • Boys Clothing
    • Child Booster Car Seats
    • Child Carriers
    • Childrens Toys
    • Craft Supplies
    • Cribs
    • Funny Parenting T Shirts
    • Girls Clothing
    • Parenting Books
    • Strollers
  • PARENTING TIPS
  • PREGNANCY
  • BABY CARE
  • TODDLERS
  • TEENS
  • HEALTH CARE
  • ACTIVITIES & CRAFTS
  • Contact
  • About

Copyright © 2022 - ParentingHere - All rights reserved.

We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept All”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. However, you may visit "Cookie Settings" to provide a controlled consent.
Cookie SettingsAccept All
Manage consent

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
CookieDurationDescription
cookielawinfo-checkbox-analytics11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-functional11 monthsThe cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-others11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
viewed_cookie_policy11 monthsThe cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
Functional
Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
Performance
Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
Analytics
Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
Advertisement
Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
Others
Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet.
SAVE & ACCEPT